~NORA EPHRON . . . yeah, I FEEL BAD & does my HEART BURN !!

NORA EPHRON was 71, and had to die . . . for me to take her seriously.

ya gotta believe in ghosts.

forget WHEN HARRY MET SALLY – WHEN NORA MEET NANCY – was long overdue. and the sparks. there are no words.
I’m reading every book of hers, I can get my hands on.
and that’s no mean accomplishment – the city’s stock of NORA EPHRON pretty sold out within 24 hrs of her death.
no joke.

speaking about OLD PEOPLE having fun: NORA EPHRON’s book of short essays – ‘I FEEL BAD ABOUT MY NECK and other thoughts on being a woman’ – was a WONDERFUL READ !! super NEW YORK, super fun, and super ahead of the curve.
plus you could learn a few things, too.

like: always tell lies, because you don’t want to be the friend that is NEVER FORGIVEN !!

as she says: “I have never forgiven one of my friends for telling me not to buy a perfectly good apartment on East Seventy-fifth Street in 1976.” (!!)
I know what she’s talking about – because I have never forgiven a friend who told me not to sleep with so and so in year . . . well, you get the picture. just don’t be that idiot.

“Everything is copy” – as in life stories, but also – as in CONTENT. which turns out to be THE most important ‘issue’ on the brave new world of the internet WEB – so there !!
“I can’t believe how real life NEVER lets you down.” that’s NORA.
“On the other hand, perhaps you CAN make this stuff up.” and that’s NORA, too.

anything she says, and everything that she says – that even touches on JOURNALISM – is a lightbulb going off . . . inside my head !! and that’s NORA, too.

all I can say is: lucky for NORA her FM radio wasn’t playing . . . bogus ‘vocals’ on the biggest rock classics, back in her day, like it is now. for sure she’d have something to say – about that.

you know: some two bit singer singing ‘UNCHAINED MELODY’ – along to the stripped-down authentic musical background tracks, ala karaoke I guess, getting passed off as the real deal. and NO, it’s not !! NO !! that is NOT the RIGHTEOUS BROTHERS !! and if they do that to JIM MORRISON and the DOORS – I will freak – and I’m pretty sure, so would Nora.

how the hell, will the young kids coming up – ever know the diff. how will they ever respect our roots, our revolution, if not ourselves – if they don’t hear the original vocals ?
how will they ever know the power of the real music that fueled us. how do radio stations get away with this. doesn’t everybody just turn the dial ? they should.
no wonder VINYL rules !! it’s the real deal. that’s what’s so scary about the the digital world – it can be photo-shopped.

so, yeah. her writing, just like her mind – was all over the place.
kinda just like mine, or so I like to think (!!) – a singular logic that has no beginning, and lucky for us, no end.

NORA’S autobiographical novel ‘HEARTBURN’ was slightly less compelling, but hey, I read it in 2 days I could not put it down, so maybe revise that. it was really really interesting as social commentary, and the issues are probably timeless, esp re: marriage – but the book is also interesting to read as an academic tool/companion to the 1986 same-named movie, which was kind of a flop. they should re-make it. the movie.

but the book – it had heart, and the best line ever:
“Show me a woman who cries when the trees lose their leaves in autumn and I’ll show you a real asshole.” – love it.

plus, how’s this for – a cheesecake recipe !!

“Here’s Amelia’s cheesecake recipe; she always said she got it from the back of the Philadelphia cream cheese package. Make a nice graham cracker crust and pack it into a 9-inch pie pan. Then mix 12 ounces cream cheese with 4 well-beaten eggs, 1 cup sugar and a teaspoon vanilla. Pour into the pie shell and bake 45 minutes at 350 degrees. Remove and cool 15 minutes.Then spread gently with 2 cups sour cream (!!) mixed with 1/2 cup sugar and bake 10 minutes more. Cool and refrigerate several hours before serving.” – NORA EPHRON, ‘HEARTBURN’.

and oh yeah, NORA had to self-publish her food recipes. can you believe that.
she had to slip them into – her novels and essays.

and . . . I ?
I have to self-publish my own photos. so I guess that makes us: soul sisters ?
except that I, I have to self-publish my essays, and art criticisms, as well. oh well, she one up on me.
plus my husband didn’t screw the Ambassador to Britain’s wife. he kinda went the other route. down and dirty. ha.
ok, enough about me !!

hey, forget when HARRY MEET SALLY – when NORA MEET NANCY – sparks flew, and it’s always amazing to find something new, even if it’s old, or maybe esp so – that can rock your world.
that’s the thing about NEW YORK.
there’s ALWAYS something NEW around the corner – and it’s still – all about the art.

and then there is LA. LA was gonna beat NYC at bat ?
dream on. I don’t think so. not in this lifetime, anyways.

ORIGINAL COPYRIGHT: 1983. I scored this secondhand copy for $6 the day after she died. in a tiny obscure secondhand book store. otherwise it’s sold out.
it’s way funny – cause it has food stains on the cover !! NORA would love that.


‘HEARTBURN’ was a thinly disguised account of their failed marriage. I just had to post this photo again – because omg – this is what a ‘lady killer’ looked like in the late 70’s. that’s so funny, I’m sorry. but NOT !!

the great thing is supposedly she did move on to find love – and a happy ever after ending with NICHOLAS PILEGGI.

and she was said to be both: GENEROUS and HAPPY as well as smart, funny and witty.

I know some old people, and some young ones who – could take a clue.

that’s the other nice thing about dead people. they can’t bully you, in their desperate quest to stay on top, or at least alive !! if they are old . . . never mind outright rip you off, ever hear the one about the charms stripped off the 18 K gold band for starters. hey Nora, do I have a story for you. and you thought your jewelry story was funny. talk about the old folk. ha. heh. heh. hey, everything is COPY. everything is fair game, in love and war.

and they can’t send you annoying emails !! – if they are young.

that go: hey we just want you to come to our opening on a hot and stifling night, with no pay. to drink some beer and party – we don’t want you to come and work, take pix and take notes and then spend a couple of days to write it up.

dudes. seriously you gonna miss me – when I’m gone.

yeah someone just called me “unethical” to-nite – because I wanted to get paid. I wanted $50 ea. per artist in an 11 person group show ?!! hint. hint. 3 of whom I have posted about for over 4 years, and 2 of those 3 I have followed for more than 10 years, no charge. ever. starting from when they were just Copper Union students.
and I don’t see anybody else writing them up – either. btw.
but somehow ARTFORUM, which you have pay just to reproduce your own god damn ad – is not ?
obviously the ELI BROAD genes skipped me – when I landed.

talk about being caught between a rock and a hard place.
no wonder all I wanna do – is read NORA EPHRON.
and eat cheesecake. with sour cream.